Archive

July 20, 2014

Why I Made Satanic Hand Gestures at Jesus Culture LA

Screen Shot 2014-07-20 at 1.31.23 PM

This past Saturday at the Jesus Culture Los Angeles conference, I stood in front of a beautiful audience and proclaimed the goodness of my God in the midst of the deepest suffering I've ever experienced—in the recent loss of my baby girl Luca Gold.

I declared that He's not a killer—that He's a Creator.  I declared His amazing will for life and life abundantly on this earth, and that none would perish.  I spoke of His light, and in Him is no darkness at all.  I pleaded with them to let this good Father into their pain—-that the Healer comes to restore, redeem, and revive the brokenness of our hearts and lives.

And I apparently threw out satanic hand gestures in the process.  (Even typing that sentence makes me chuckle like a little school girl).

When the JC backstage crew asked if I wanted a hand held or wireless mic, I jumped at the chance to use the wireless mic.  Why?  Because my long, skinny arms like to flail like a bird while I'm passionately talking about my beautiful Jesus.  If you've been around me at all, you know I use my hands a lot.  And by ‘a lot' I mean…….a ridiculously unusual amount.  It's who I am, and I have no intention of changing anytime soon.

At catering on Saturday after I spoke, I asked my good friend Darren (who works for Jesus Culture)  if he thought I had said anything too controversial in my talk, to which he replied, ‘Um, no, not at all.  But there's some controversy on our Jesus Culture Facebook page about you throwing out satanic hand gestures.'

For a fraction of a second, I thought he was joking.  Me, accused of making satanic hand gestures during a talk where I'm making a case about the goodness of God—against the enemy?   Oh yes, friends.  I'm apparently full of all sorts of evil subliminal messages that I didn't know about.

(And now I'm chuckling uncontrollably again).

During my talk on Saturday, Darren clicked a picture while my flailing, bird-like arms illustrated the goodness of God, and in that fraction of a second freeze frame, my hands did what you're looking at in the picture above.  Unbeknownst to me, this is some sort of satanic situation.  (As well as ‘hang loose,' but no one seemed to accuse me of being a surfer).

Up until this point, I've been extremely grateful that people who disagree with my beliefs have also been incredibly respectful of my current situation—that my fragile heart is still grieving the loss of my daughter.  I don't mind people disagreeing with what I believe—no one is ever going to get everything right and I'm fully aware I'll be growing and learning for the rest of my life!  But I've whole-heartedly appreciated the tasteful comments through the love of strangers in my recent process of grieving over the last four months since her death.

But this satanic hand gesture thing is just so ridiculous, it doesn't really sting.  It gives me a bit of comic relief.

 

Here's a friendly reminder from a fellow Christian who absolutely loves being a Christian.  People don't want to join our family because we throw punches at each other—especially while we're wounded.  We'd rather be right than be in relationship.  We'd rather fight each other than than fight the real enemy.  We know in part, we don't understand the fullness of someone's situation, and we think because a person is showing up in our Facebook feed, that gives us permission to give our opinion, or rip them to shreds through our keyboards—all in the name of Jesus.  I guarantee you, every comment posted about how my hand gestures made people ‘uncomfortable' or how I was an agent of evil were comments from people who a) didn't listen to my message, b) don't know who I am, and c) definitely aren't aware of my heart for Jesus.

Which means, they're judging someone's HEART from a freeze frame picture they see in a Facebook feed.  And this is a very dangerous thing to do.

I Samuel 16:7 says,People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”  And every day, I sure am grateful for this truth as I remind myself of the power behind these words.  I can't ever judge what's in front of me because at the end of the day, I'll never know the fullness of what's in someone's heart—especially if all I have to go on is a picture and a quote that's out of context. 

Our hearts can't ever be displayed in a picture.  Our lives can never be read in one sentence from a sermon.  

But thank goodness this beautiful God looks beyond what we can see with our eyes—peering deep inside the intentions, longings, and beatings of our hearts.  

Which also means, dear friends, that as a Christian, it's my responsibility to look beyond the accusatory comments, knowing there's something in the person's heart that needs a dose of Jesus' love and grace.

 

Let me leave you with this thought today.  The next time you start to hurl a stone at a stranger who is on stage, or on television, or because you see their picture with zero knowledge of the person behind the picture, take a moment and remember the words in Ephesians 4:29:

Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up,[a] as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear.”

My prayer is that one day Christians, we don't swing at our own—especially those who are in the process of healing.  My prayer is that one day Christians, we're so loved, we have a lot of love to give away.   My prayer is that one day Christians, we see through the beauty of grace, through the power of forgiveness, administering the healing kisses of kindness.

And after reading the words of Mahatma Ghandi,  “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians.  Your Christians are so unlike your Christ,”  my prayer is, Christians, that one day, we finally look and sound like the Christ that we represent on this earth—especially when we're dealing with one another.

Which is why, for every stone thrown my way, I get to turn around and extend the greatest love of all—the love of my Jesus.

xx,

CHRISTA BLACK_OFFICIAL

 

 

49 Responses to “Why I Made Satanic Hand Gestures at Jesus Culture LA”

  1. Bristen

    I love your thoughts so much, and I love you. Your heart for Jesus and your love for people even in the midst of your suffering is such a huge example and encouragement to me. Thank you for your example. It truly is making a difference and touching lives, one of which is mine. Much love, Christa! <3 Bristen from Louisiana

  2. Charlotte

    I just have to say that you’re a hero, Christa! Showing Jesus’ love in everything.
    But one thing I find hilarious is that…. As a metalhead, I’ve seen a lot of “devilhorns” and “metal signs” in my days. And after seeing the picture I can boldly say: THAT’S NOT IT! There are two kinds you can do, and you’re doing neither. Unless there’s a really hardcore satanic one I don’t know about. And even if what you did in that picture had been one of the signs I mentioned, I can tell you all that it also means LOVE in sign language! (At least in Sweden.) So.. I pray that people stop being so paranoid, and just hear what’s coming out of the mouth.. because that is what the heart is full of. And that is what shifts atmospheres. Gods word spoken by a daughter or a son, in spirit and truth. And at the end of the day HE is so much bigger than a metal sign… Or a hang loose sign. 😉 His love, humour and grace abounds. <3
    Love!

  3. Jennifer Jones Carder

    Oh my word!! This is so cookoo!! When I read the headline, saw the picture…I was trying my darnedest to figure out what was satanic….um, when I looked at your hands.. I automatically thought of Hawaii!! I knew that y’all had just been there, so maybe you became a surfer girl while there, right? People are so crazy! Love you, Christa!! Keep pressing, keep shining, keep loving! I think you’re pretty awesome & totally inspiring! Shine bright girl, shine bright!

  4. Jennifer Jones Carder

    Oh my word!! This is so cookoo!! When I read the headline, saw the picture…I was trying my darnedest to figure out what was satanic….um, when I looked at your hands.. I automatically thought of Hawaii!! I knew that y’all had just been there, so maybe you became a surfer girl while there, right? People are so crazy! Love you, Christa!! Keep pressing, keep shining, keep loving! I think you’re pretty awesome & totally inspiring! Shine bright girl, shine bright!

  5. Sharon O'Neill

    Actually the sign for I love you also includes the pointer finger upright with the pinkie and thumb up and out, but depending on the motion of your arms and hands this could also mean “stay”, “continue”, or “eternity”. I have two adult deaf children and am a sign language interpreter as well. So sorry for your loss Christa.

  6. Amanda Law

    I’m so sorry to hear about the way you have been treated Christa especially from the very ones who should be supporting you and your ministry and at such a fragile time in your life. You know what they say you can chose your friends but you can’t choose your family, everyone has members of the family that are a little prickly, it seems that we all need to love a little more and stop tearing each other apart, bless you xx

  7. Amanda Law

    I’m so sorry to hear about the way you have been treated Christa especially from the very ones who should be supporting you and your ministry and at such a fragile time in your life. You know what they say you can chose your friends but you can’t choose your family, everyone has members of the family that are a little prickly, it seems that we all need to love a little more and stop tearing each other apart, bless you xx

  8. Brett FISH Anderson

    best post from a satanic hand gesturer i’ve read all week
    glad you can find the humour Christa
    the line about people not wanting to play with us because we hurt our own is too real and too heart-breaking
    so if you could just be throwing out less of the offensive hand signals we can all get back to what we’re good at – word sledging
    help us God
    keep on – you are doing some great stuff
    love brett fish tongue firmly in cheek anderson

  9. michelle lucio

    Dang. Yes. A word most certainly for us all. Thank you for approaching such small-mindedness with wisdom and grace. I read this and I think of that verse in Proverbs 31 that reads, “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.” Love reading your work – keep it comin’!

  10. michelle lucio

    Dang. Yes. A word most certainly for us all. Thank you for approaching such small-mindedness with wisdom and grace. I read this and I think of that verse in Proverbs 31 that reads, “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.” Love reading your work – keep it comin’!

  11. Stephanie McIntosh

    It’s amazing how the same Pharases that accused Jesus are still hanging out and accusing his disciples. As the power and manifestation of God arises, evil rises, truly our fight isn’t against flesh and blood but agains darkness. I read your post about your little Goldie, and the strength and power from His grace is such an inspiration. God bless you! 🙂

  12. Stephanie McIntosh

    It’s amazing how the same Pharases that accused Jesus are still hanging out and accusing his disciples. As the power and manifestation of God arises, evil rises, truly our fight isn’t against flesh and blood but agains darkness. I read your post about your little Goldie, and the strength and power from His grace is such an inspiration. God bless you! 🙂

  13. Leesa Roper Dunn

    Your classes were beautiful and authentic and I took home so much personally from them. Thank you for not allowing others to keep you from delivering your real and raw personal life experiences so that people like me can take away how God’s goodness can heal all wounds and transform all lives. Well done and I am giggling with you about the absurdity of someone making something from absolutely nothing.

  14. Allison Bown

    I love Graham Cooke’s thoughts in “Seeing in the Spirit”: “Snapshots are cheap shots”. A moment in time, even when someone IS aware of their actions, is still just a moment in who they are. And when it’s like this (I thought it was a surfer thing too!)… well, I’m glad you found the humor. The good news is, that if this was the enemy’s best shot at you on that day, you apparently haven’t left him much to work with. This was what he came up with? Laughable indeed.

  15. Rachelle Mendez Meents

    Christa..I am so happy that our Precious Father judges our Hearts and not our hand gestures. Also, I am so glad that His Grace extends to us in Every Aspect of our Lives.
    I heard you speak, I was sitting in the Audience and what you spoke was life changing for me.
    Coming out of a 25 year Meth Addiction, and now working with women who have been sex trafficked…I see a lot of pain as well as still dealing with my own healing.
    Thank You for being so Transparent and for Knowing Your God so Well…and sharing that with us…You are an Inspiration and I’m taking EVERYTHING God spoke to me about back to my work place and I’m gonna walk in what He had called me to walk in!!
    Rachelle

  16. Rachelle Mendez Meents

    Christa..I am so happy that our Precious Father judges our Hearts and not our hand gestures. Also, I am so glad that His Grace extends to us in Every Aspect of our Lives.
    I heard you speak, I was sitting in the Audience and what you spoke was life changing for me.
    Coming out of a 25 year Meth Addiction, and now working with women who have been sex trafficked…I see a lot of pain as well as still dealing with my own healing.
    Thank You for being so Transparent and for Knowing Your God so Well…and sharing that with us…You are an Inspiration and I’m taking EVERYTHING God spoke to me about back to my work place and I’m gonna walk in what He had called me to walk in!!
    Rachelle

  17. Rachel Shetterly

    It may be the very thing God had designed to use to give you the gift of laughter in the midst of your deep grief??? God can use anything, right? Even hand gestures done in innocence! Haters are gonna find a reason to hate. Giggle away for God truly does know your heart, and in that knowledge is freedom to laugh hysterically!

  18. Wow. I don’t mean to make light of the complaint, because clearly it happened. But please don’t give this misplaced, misguided and sad complaint a second thought. Additionally, I would like to say to Christa, that I read your story and was devastated by it. I have 4 kids and have never even heard of what Luca had. You are 10 times the spouse, parent and christian that I will ever be. Go with God, and may your family push a little harder knowing that God has giving you something; a calling, blessing, or both that is beyond comprehension.

  19. Tracy~BelovedOfJesus

    I wanted to give you a hug so badly. I had three of your books in my purse and a smart phone… and instead of wanting a selfie or a signature… I wanted a hug and more importantly, you to lay hands on me and pray over me. I believe you are anointed in a special way that my heart and soul desire to follow. I cried and cried as you spoke. From the moment you stepped on stage, before you even said “Hello,” I sensed Jesus Christ. I had never heard of you before JCLA and now I have purchased 3 of your books, one for me and two for friends. Almost every sentence you shared was a God revelation for me. Remember… you are a threat to the enemy. PLEASE never stop speaking with body language because of this silly comment. I understood your message so much better because of your constant movement and gestures. I am curious as to when this moment even happened… you were probably SPOT ON to be using it. I just laugh… because that gesture means so much to me, “Hang Loose,” “Ridiculous,” “A little something something,” “crazy.” I THINK IT IS SO FUNNY AND SO BIBLICAL that this would of course be the kind of childish and ridiculous response the enemy would want to distract the world from your beautiful message of healing. Literally, my life has been transformed by your message. TRANSFORMED! I once was blind, but now I see, because I was a member in that audience that day who KNOWS! the only thing radiating from you in that moment was God’s GREAT love and healing. Be so blessed. Jesus has your back and so do I! 😉

  20. Tracy~BelovedOfJesus

    I wanted to give you a hug so badly. I had three of your books in my purse and a smart phone… and instead of wanting a selfie or a signature… I wanted a hug and more importantly, you to lay hands on me and pray over me. I believe you are anointed in a special way that my heart and soul desire to follow. I cried and cried as you spoke. From the moment you stepped on stage, before you even said “Hello,” I sensed Jesus Christ. I had never heard of you before JCLA and now I have purchased 3 of your books, one for me and two for friends. Almost every sentence you shared was a God revelation for me. Remember… you are a threat to the enemy. PLEASE never stop speaking with body language because of this silly comment. I understood your message so much better because of your constant movement and gestures. I am curious as to when this moment even happened… you were probably SPOT ON to be using it. I just laugh… because that gesture means so much to me, “Hang Loose,” “Ridiculous,” “A little something something,” “crazy.” I THINK IT IS SO FUNNY AND SO BIBLICAL that this would of course be the kind of childish and ridiculous response the enemy would want to distract the world from your beautiful message of healing. Literally, my life has been transformed by your message. TRANSFORMED! I once was blind, but now I see, because I was a member in that audience that day who KNOWS! the only thing radiating from you in that moment was God’s GREAT love and healing. Be so blessed. Jesus has your back and so do I! 😉

  21. Tracy~BelovedOfJesus

    DUDE!!! Do you remember when you said something like this, “When we are hurt terribly and deeply, IF WE ARE NOT HEALED and we try and proclaim the gospel, THE FIRST moment of rejection… we lower our theology to PLEASE so we aren’t rejected more.” I THINK YOU JUST PROVED YOU ARE HEALING WITHOUT INFECTION!!!!! Yay!!! Sorry, I just had to say that… because I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!

  22. Tracy~BelovedOfJesus

    DUDE!!! Do you remember when you said something like this, “When we are hurt terribly and deeply, IF WE ARE NOT HEALED and we try and proclaim the gospel, THE FIRST moment of rejection… we lower our theology to PLEASE so we aren’t rejected more.” I THINK YOU JUST PROVED YOU ARE HEALING WITHOUT INFECTION!!!!! Yay!!! Sorry, I just had to say that… because I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!

  23. Natalia

    Well said!! So grateful for you honesty and courage by addressing this. My respect for you has grown even more. I’m happy to see someone with a high profile speaking up about this. This change that needs to be made is long overdue!!!

  24. Natalia

    Well said!! So grateful for you honesty and courage by addressing this. My respect for you has grown even more. I’m happy to see someone with a high profile speaking up about this. This change that needs to be made is long overdue!!!

  25. ingamae

    I think Bill Johnson spoke about how the enemy doesn’t usually like to be known or let you know that he is there. In other words when he is doing things like revealing himself like this that only means it is his last weapon and he is out of ammunition. He’d much rather stay hidden. This, my friend, only means one thing. YOU ARE NAILING IT by PROCLAIMING WHAT JESUS WAS NAILED ON THAT CROSS TO PROCLAIM!! JESUS LOVESSSSS THE WORLD and that is that. I love you and your message. Rock on my friend Rock on!!!!!

  26. Amy Reed

    Christa, your talk was seriously one of the most powerful messages I have ever heard. God spoke to me through it, and the tears were a’flowin. If satanic hand gestures were what sparked that experience with Christ? Then bring on the hand gestures.
    Thanks for being a blessing!

  27. Amy Reed

    Christa, your talk was seriously one of the most powerful messages I have ever heard. God spoke to me through it, and the tears were a’flowin. If satanic hand gestures were what sparked that experience with Christ? Then bring on the hand gestures.
    Thanks for being a blessing!

  28. Amen, I was incredibly inspired during your talk on Saturday. I truly feel like I was healed during our prayer at the end so thank you so much for sharing your heart with us and being such an inspiration ! : ] Blessings to you and your family xoxo

  29. Amen, I was incredibly inspired during your talk on Saturday. I truly feel like I was healed during our prayer at the end so thank you so much for sharing your heart with us and being such an inspiration ! : ] Blessings to you and your family xoxo

  30. Candace

    I saw this blog post as a tweet from a Pastor at my church. I’m in complete shock how out of touch people are. This sort of thing is something I deal with on a very regular basis. I go to goth/industrial events. I’m involved in the subculture. So many people are so fast to judge and not fast enough to look into something or stop to think “Hey, maybe God knows their heart and I don’t.”

    By the way, the hand gesture you’re showing here is the “shaka” which is a symbol commonly seen in Hawaii and associated with surfing. There are no satanic connotations to it at *all* except for random, made up things one can find on the internet.

    I’m so very sorry that you felt judged to the point where you felt you had to write this.

  31. The satanic gestures thing is really funny! Had me cracking up!
    I’m so inspired by you and all the courage that you have. I thank God for the message you gave and thank you for doing so. One of my relatives was there that day and she has gone through a lot of pain and heartache in the past. I didn’t know how to approach her because her wounds were so big that she had a tendency to lash out when I tried to talk to her about her getting better through God (she is a believer). So in all I thank God that he used your message to say all that I once have wanted to say, but you said it wayyy better and cooler hehe! I would have gotten emotional once I started talking. In all, that message has touched her life and I am so grateful that she was brought to the Healer! I love you and I thank God and as well as you Christa! Much love!

  32. The satanic gestures thing is really funny! Had me cracking up!
    I’m so inspired by you and all the courage that you have. I thank God for the message you gave and thank you for doing so. One of my relatives was there that day and she has gone through a lot of pain and heartache in the past. I didn’t know how to approach her because her wounds were so big that she had a tendency to lash out when I tried to talk to her about her getting better through God (she is a believer). So in all I thank God that he used your message to say all that I once have wanted to say, but you said it wayyy better and cooler hehe! I would have gotten emotional once I started talking. In all, that message has touched her life and I am so grateful that she was brought to the Healer! I love you and I thank God and as well as you Christa! Much love!

  33. Javi Reyes

    Man this is hysterical. Who ever accused you must of not paid any attention to your words. O for one couldn’t stop crying and then laughing. When you spoke abouy your “Diamond Cave” and how you got that gift. I was a little girl just balling….however my favorite part of it was when you spoke about your loss and as clear as thunder I heard the Lords voice say, “behold my soldier” and my heart jumped out of my chest cause I’ve never been in the presemce of that kind of elite warrior that the Lord would personally speak of. Sis your were my highlight of the conference. I got to meet you and you hugged me and I felt I was anointed by you. Your inspirational and beautiful in every meaning of both those words. The funnest part of actually gettinf to see you after reading the book was that you are so animated and vivid in real life. You came alieve. It was beautiful and im forvever indebted to you. What you said about God “allowing” those things its revolutionary. I believe your right. …fight on sis! !! FIGHT ON!!!!!!! WOOP WOOP!!!

  34. Christa… I was there… I was so deeply moved by your time on stage. It NEVER once occurred to me that you were anything less than 100% genuine and transparent. I cried with you. I felt encouraged by you. I felt hope. You quickly became my favorite speaker, and I could not wait to purchase your book. When I read about the “satanic gestures”, I thought it was a joke as well. People certainly do dig for stuff that simply is not there. Perhaps you hit too close to home for some? Who knows… But, I do know that God used you (and continues to) to touch so many of us. No matter how difficult it can be to hear about all the ugly broken pieces, it is also the very thing that can set us free. Knowing I am not alone…. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Your words, your rawness, your being real forever changed me… flailing arms (or hand gestures!-lol) and all. Bless you, beautiful woman of God!

  35. Thank you for the message you shared at JCLA and how transparent and vulnerable you are! The end of your message about your diamond cave really spoke to me and I gained a lot of healing during your prayer time. I didn’t realize the walls I had built between me and Jesus because of the disappointments I had gone through and they came down after your message! You are a beautiful woman of God and I’m so glad I met you and Moses last year at JCLA because that’s how I started following you and your words are life-changing and life-giving! So thank you, thank you for all that you share with the world!

  36. LauraB1186

    So sad to hear people questioning you because of that. Reminds me of all those Illuminati/satanic conspirasy videos, accusing everyone from President Bush to Christian artists of being dangerous for whatever flimsy reason.

  37. LauraB1186

    So sad to hear people questioning you because of that. Reminds me of all those Illuminati/satanic conspirasy videos, accusing everyone from President Bush to Christian artists of being dangerous for whatever flimsy reason.

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