If they made a spin-off of the movie Wedding Crashers called Wedding Criers, I'd be your star.
The second the guy gets a glimpse of his future bride for the first time and starts to choke up, forget about it. I'm a goner. And then you go to a wedding like the one I went to this weekend for my dear friend Kris Wolf (aka…the NICEST guy in the entire freaking universe) and his lovely bride, the former Miss USA, Kristen Dalton.
Blubberfest, I tell ya.
Amidst the colorful pink, blue, and purple bridesmaids poised in their best pageant poses, the former queen glowed with a radiance brighter than any earthly crown she had ever won. She was a woman in love, a woman who had been swept off of her feet, and a woman who had dreamed as a little girl about this fairytale moment. And here was her prince charming–at almost a decade older in years–who stood in front of her confessing that as year after lonely year rolled by, he though maybe God had forgotten him. But he had persevered and stood strong, waiting and holding onto hope for this very moment.
And by waited, I mean waited. In every sense of the word.
Both had said no in years past when love seemed strong, but there was no covenant. Both had fought the hard road, had resisted what seemed natural and normal to now stand before God, family, and friends and come together as one.
And as she pulled off the purity ring she had proudly worn from a young age, placing it into his hand–and as he took it from her like a precious prize, having fought to keep her pure—she gave him more than just a ring of gold.
They gave each other years of agony.
They gave each other years of longing.
They gave each other years of overcome temptation, of saying no when they wanted to say yes, of precious moments of sacrifice that money can never buy.
They gave each other the gift of themselves.
Some say purity is dead in our modern world, but I saw it alive and well this weekend in the actions of my friends. It's a hard path, a costly path, but the payoff is far greater than what was sacrificed.
Some call that foolish. Some call that naive. Some would laugh and scoff, championing loveless sexual escapades and experiences that lead to simply another memory of a person they will never truly know. But as new life begins together as one flesh, they aren't bringing the past into their marriage bed. They're bringing the hope of their new future, along with the sacrificial gift of themselves.
And what better wedding present could you bring to the one you love?
If you've read my book God Loves Ugly, you know that this gift of physical purity was the gift my Studhub brought to me, but one I was unable to bring to him. Because we no longer have to live under shame as believers (thank you Romans 8!), I carry absolutely NO shame of this in our marriage, and Lucas doesn't hold me to any shame. I will say though, the pain of my past sexual disfunction, of sexual abuse and struggling in that area for years–has felt like a mountain on top of layers that needed healing within our relationship.
And dang, it would have been much easier if that mountain hadn't been there to begin with. But it was and is…so we move FORWARD.
The fabulous thing is, all sexual disfunction, all past experiences, ALL of it was absorbed into the person of Jesus Christ when I said yes to Him. The memories are where the battle is. The conditioned responses and thought patterns are where the battle is.
If I could have brought physical virginity to my husband, are you kidding me? No brainer! But if Jesus doesn't remember our past….if they're removed as far as the east is from the west…..then WE must choose to forget them as he does.
If you haven't waited then guess what….THERE'S NO SHAME. AND WE ARE FORGIVEN AND HEALED.
But the time and energy I have had to spend on forgiveness and healing, I would have much rather been able to simply enjoy the purity of my relationship and build from that foundation.
And If you're still waiting…I promise you……WAIT.
And I have a feeling my friends Kris and Kristen would say IT'S WORTH IT.
To read more about Kris & Kristen, his newest blog “10 Ways To Win A Girl's Heart” is amazing!
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I honestly think you did bring purity to your husband. When Jesus came into your life, I believe you were healed from the past, and it was as if you were starting over. 🙂 I’m going to share this with my niece. As for me, as a believer and a single 34 year old, I’m waiting for that one and he doesn’t seem to be anywhere in sight yet. But I’m determined to remain pure no matter what. 🙂
This is Awesome! My Fiance and I both waited and our wedding is in 3 short months and we can’t wait! I always said I was going to wait, but I never thought my future husband would also be a virgin, but did God have a surprise for me! Reading this truly touched my heart, and I’m so glad to see others also waiting! What a beautiful thing!!! 🙂
This is Awesome! My Fiance and I both waited and our wedding is in 3 short months and we can’t wait! I always said I was going to wait, but I never thought my future husband would also be a virgin, but did God have a surprise for me! Reading this truly touched my heart, and I’m so glad to see others also waiting! What a beautiful thing!!! 🙂
My Husband and I were both virgins when we shared our Marriage Bed. The both of us feel and felt that was the most precious gift we could give one another, now, then and forever.
My Husband and I were both virgins when we shared our Marriage Bed. The both of us feel and felt that was the most precious gift we could give one another, now, then and forever.
yes it is not natural anymore for some people. But me as a believer I am still waiting too. Sometimes it is difficult but God is with me. I know it is worth it. God bless all You who are waiting as me. Sorry for my Eglish.
yes it is not natural anymore for some people. But me as a believer I am still waiting too. Sometimes it is difficult but God is with me. I know it is worth it. God bless all You who are waiting as me. Sorry for my Eglish.
it is true. because of how sin has so skewed the view of people and how society view it now they see as being a virgin being extinct when they suppose to see it as something blessing, something to treasure. if the other person doesn’t treasure that gift you have to wait until marriage then that person doesn’t treasure you as a gift from God to them at all. those who are still waiting, continue to wait. those who didn’t wait, the fact that you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour and you surrendered and stopped yourself from committing that same sin, you are made new, as the bible says “old things have passed away behold all things are made new”. so when you do say those vows to your husband and enter into that matrimonial bed it will be something new and different, something that you would have never experienced before because, God is in the centre of it and the head of your union. so for those who didn’t wait don’t loose hope. now that you know the truth and you are living for God, now choose to wait, this will be a new wait. and it will all be worth your while, just as if you had wait before. be blessed my sisters in Christ
it is true. because of how sin has so skewed the view of people and how society view it now they see as being a virgin being extinct when they suppose to see it as something blessing, something to treasure. if the other person doesn’t treasure that gift you have to wait until marriage then that person doesn’t treasure you as a gift from God to them at all. those who are still waiting, continue to wait. those who didn’t wait, the fact that you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour and you surrendered and stopped yourself from committing that same sin, you are made new, as the bible says “old things have passed away behold all things are made new”. so when you do say those vows to your husband and enter into that matrimonial bed it will be something new and different, something that you would have never experienced before because, God is in the centre of it and the head of your union. so for those who didn’t wait don’t loose hope. now that you know the truth and you are living for God, now choose to wait, this will be a new wait. and it will all be worth your while, just as if you had wait before. be blessed my sisters in Christ
LOVE!! And so encouraging!! I wrote a post a few months back about being a virgin. Or as I like to call it, a “Unicorn”. We are definitely still out there. Haha! Even those of us over 30 😉 With that said, thanks for this beautiful post! xox
And if you wanna check out my post “The Last 2 Virgins on Earth: Part Deux & the Unicorns”, here’s my link:
http://www.puerilityvol1.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-last-2-virgins-on-earth-part-deux.html
LOVE!! And so encouraging!! I wrote a post a few months back about being a virgin. Or as I like to call it, a “Unicorn”. We are definitely still out there. Haha! Even those of us over 30 😉 With that said, thanks for this beautiful post! xox
And if you wanna check out my post “The Last 2 Virgins on Earth: Part Deux & the Unicorns”, here’s my link:
http://www.puerilityvol1.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-last-2-virgins-on-earth-part-deux.html
I was 28 when I got married and was HONESTLY & PROUDLY able to wear my white gown representing my purity! There’s NO SHAME in waiting & I’d do it ALL OVER AGAIN if I was given the choice!
I was 28 when I got married and was HONESTLY & PROUDLY able to wear my white gown representing my purity! There’s NO SHAME in waiting & I’d do it ALL OVER AGAIN if I was given the choice!
Thank you for this. I am so encouraged in my walk. As I read this I feel at peace and excited. Love!
Thank you for this. I am so encouraged in my walk. As I read this I feel at peace and excited. Love!
This is comedic. I guess Reid Rosenthal lied when he was saying a typical date consisted of dinner and sex with her?
This is comedic. I guess Reid Rosenthal lied when he was saying a typical date consisted of dinner and sex with her?
Awesome! Awesome!! Awesome!!! I too believe in an exclusive love where it’s not, “I will wait for you”, but rather, “I will wait with you until God leads us to each other.”
Awesome! Awesome!! Awesome!!! I too believe in an exclusive love where it’s not, “I will wait for you”, but rather, “I will wait with you until God leads us to each other.”
I am holding onto this gift until I meet my husband!! I want to be able to look into the eyes of my husband on my wedding day, knowing that I have not given such an intimate gift to anyone else. So many people (even christians) are giving it away, because it seems people feel they need to “try it on”, before they make that commitment. I pray that I will be able to keep myself so that on that day when I say “I do” and make that covenant before God and others that I will be able to than give one of the most incredible gifts God gives in the context of marriage!! I wear a white gold, heart ring with a diamond in the middle as a symbol of my commitment to remain pure before God in my body, but also in my heart. The day of my wedding that ring will be exchanged with a wedding ring, and two will become one.
I am holding onto this gift until I meet my husband!! I want to be able to look into the eyes of my husband on my wedding day, knowing that I have not given such an intimate gift to anyone else. So many people (even christians) are giving it away, because it seems people feel they need to “try it on”, before they make that commitment. I pray that I will be able to keep myself so that on that day when I say “I do” and make that covenant before God and others that I will be able to than give one of the most incredible gifts God gives in the context of marriage!! I wear a white gold, heart ring with a diamond in the middle as a symbol of my commitment to remain pure before God in my body, but also in my heart. The day of my wedding that ring will be exchanged with a wedding ring, and two will become one.