Hi. ???????? I'm Christa. .
And at 39 years old, I'm finally getting the courage to start being myself privately AND publicly. .
For many years I chose things to make people like me. I made choices to avoid rejection. I chose to perform FOR love instead of finding what I liked and own it. I chose clothes to fit in with certain groups…or to make sure I wasn't too attractive as a good married woman. ????I chose music because it was what I was supposed to be listening to to advance my spiritual life, and not because it was even a style I enjoyed. ????I chose to serve others to GET love back INSTEAD of giving because I was full of love to give.????????I chose to like movies that others liked, & eat certain foods because they were cool. ????I have chosen designer things because they were designer and would get home and wonder what in the world I was going to do with with five inch orange patent leather ???? . ????????‍♀️ I have chosen to censor myself to avoid rocking the boat, and chosen to stay silent to avoid hate bloggers. ???? .
But then one day I woke up. ???????? I looked in the mirror and asked myself, “Christa, who the hell are you, and what do YOU like?” ???? (clearly, at times I like to choose a good, solid curse word). ☺️ I didn’t ask…what does your family expect you to be? Or what do your friends need you to be? I didn’t ask….what do I need to be to make my husband love me more, or what do I need to write to gain more followers? I look deeply into my eyes and asked….
WHO AM I?
WHAT DO I LIKE?
WHAT AM I CREATED TO SAY?
WHAT DO I WANT TO WEAR?
WHAT DO I LIKE TO EAT?
WHAT KIND OF WOMAN DO I WANT TO BE?
WHO WOULD I BE IF I WASN'T AFRAID? ????
.
I’m far from having all the answers to these questions, but for the first time in my life I’m willing to ask.  Because at the end of the day, am I going to play it safe and make choices to keep people around, or am I going to risk it all and choose to be the person God created me to be—regardless of what happens?
.
(Day 4's girl today in the Choose Yourself Challenge dives more into this!) link in profile #instanlkg #MasterHeart#chooseyourselfchallenge