Your throat is scratchy, you feel as though you might cough up a lung, and the thermometer is reading over 101 degrees, making the ache in your body almost unbearable.
No one shuns you for heading to the doctor, reading your clear physical cues to help you get the medicine needed to regain your health.
So why in the world are we ashamed to get help when our emotional health is showing signs of sickness?
My main audience is the church world.
And I meet Christian after Christian crippled emotionally by old heart woulds, pulling me aside to whisper their shameful secrets that they've been too afraid to tell anyone. I get person after person begging me to lay hands on them and pray, hoping that I impart my years of intimacy, healing, and history with the Healer. And though I whole-heartedly believe in the power of prayer to set people free, I also believe this with my whole heart….
Your heart took decades to break. And it might take a bit of intentionality, focus, care, love, and nurture to get it patched up again.
Over the last 2.5 years, just a few months before my sweet little Goldie passed away, I shifted my focus from my external world and pointed my laser beam deep into my broken heart. The broken parts of my heart were destroying my marriage. The broken parts of my heart were ruining my closest relationships. The broken parts of my heart were sabotaging success, keeping me in cycles of mediocrity and apathy. I knew that if I didn't find clarity inside my broken heart, blowing back the fog to finally see the truth about my inner world—the good, the bad, and the very very broken—those wounds would keep poisoning me inside, crippling and destroying the rest of my life.
So friend, how is your emotional health RIGHT NOW?
Are you ever bitter?
Are you ever anxious?
Does anger spew out when you least expect it?
Have you forgiven yourself, and those who have hurt you?
Have you truly let go of the past and found peace?
Do you find yourself easily frustrated?
Do you judge yourself, living under the weight of shame?
Can you receive compliments?
Do you feel guilty?
Can you cry?
Do you push down your true feelings to get things accomplished?
Do you feel like you're too sensitive?
Can you receive love you didn't earn?
Do you struggle with addiction, depression, compulsions, or self-loathing?
You see, though your entire heart might be SAVED by the power, love, grace, and forgiveness of the Holy Spirit, it is highly likely that ALL of your old wounds have found their way into relationships with the Healer who lives inside.
And I want to teach you how to do this.
I want to teach you to put on the goggles of heaven and beginning with your inseparable connection with love, spelunking down into your heart to connect DEEPLY with yourself, your truth, your ugly, your reality, your pain—finding that the Healer has been waiting for you in the place you've tried desperately to avoid.
God has been waiting for you smack dab in the middle of your broken heart.
It's very sad to me how a majority of the Evangelical world focuses on externals, judging our devotion to God simply by the work of our hands, our aversion to sinful deeds, or our ability to hide our shortcomings and build our ministry platforms. I hear sermons about how you can't love Jesus and sleep around, or stay addicted, or lie and cheat—which is enough to make my blood boil. Every moment of my sexual and substance addictions were TORMENTED with shame, fear, and hatred for what I was doing—trying everything to stop but having no idea how.
My fearful behavior only pointed to a lack of love. My internal pain ALWAYS created pain in my external world—until I took my focus off all the symptoms of my sickness and started focusing on the REAL problem—my broken heart that felt separated from Love.
Though you can never be separated from the love of God, you can absolutely live like you are.
Almost weekly, I hear of another marriage falling apart, another affair, another sexual addiction, another person falling into addiction and depression–many times in full time ministry. We praise the mind, learning theological concepts about the Trinity to stuff facts into our brains, but very rarely making space to let the Spirit of truth sink deeply into the depth of our hearts….
Being still.
Transforming us with relational LOVE.
Weighing us down with weighty PEACE.
Bubbling up with overflowing JOY.
Binding us up with true HEALING.
Every person that I know needs inner healing. EVERY person I know. No matter how powerful, how free, or how successful I become in my outer world, for the rest of my life I will need daily intentionality to recalibrate my internal realm, surrendering more inner land into the hands of LOVE—learning how to live fully connected to Love in every moment. For the REST of my life, I will find myself hit by stones from a wounded, fallen world, needing a personal Healer to run to IMMEDIATELY so the emotional wounds don't fester and affect everything.
When pain comes at you to blow your heart up emotionally, what do you do with the wounds?
If you're tired of the emotional roller coaster, feeling like your heart is a mystery that can't be solved…..
If you've hardened up to survive….
If you look in the mirror and spew with emotional negativity….
If the weight of your inner world is dragging you down into depression and fear….
If your body is holding onto extra weight or sickness from emotional trauma….
If you've tried to change everything about your behaviors, but you still can't find peace…..
Then do what I did.
Stop avoiding your broken heart.
Start treating like your heart like you would treat a bomb victim. Start looking at your heart like it's been in wreck after wreck, crippled by emotional pain that won't go away in it's own. It needs nurture. It needs care. It needs grace. It needs healing. It needs time. It needs love.
And it's the whole reason the Savior and Healer moved into the middle of your mess—to begin the beauty of heart restoration.
Want to learn how?
You don't need another book. You don't need another sermon. You need practical tools put directly in your hands, you need accountability, with guided inner healing encounters that lead you directly into the hands of someone far more capable than me….
The Holy Spirit, Counselor, Healer, Redeemer, and Restorer who abides inside of you.
I'm just a guide who leads you to love. Then, LOVE does all the work.
My new book Heart Made Whole (released June 7) is one of many tools and resources I'll be providing in this next season to help hold your hand and walk WITH you into the inner transformation you deserve–and have always dreamed about. As you preorder the book and spread the word, you'll have access to prerelease guided Encounter musical tracks, discounts to ECourses and daily affirmations, and access to me via a personal Facebook page and Webinar Q&A's.
Excited to take this next journey together. Excited to teach each one of you how to move from head to heart—living deeply connected to yourself, consciously connected to Love, and to the Holy Spirit who already resides inside.
You can to have what you've always wanted.
You can have a Heart Made Whole.
XX,
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This is the most timely thing I’ve ever read in my life up to this point. This year I have experienced loss after loss and only to push down the feelings and hurt with busyness and work. After thoughtfully making the decision (as well as publicly announcing) to give up some of my passions and dreams in order to focus on myself, I wondered where I would start next. Thank you for writing this and being willing to share your own vulnerability with others. It inspires me to do the same. Pre-Ordering your book now.
This is the most timely thing I’ve ever read in my life up to this point. This year I have experienced loss after loss and only to push down the feelings and hurt with busyness and work. After thoughtfully making the decision (as well as publicly announcing) to give up some of my passions and dreams in order to focus on myself, I wondered where I would start next. Thank you for writing this and being willing to share your own vulnerability with others. It inspires me to do the same. Pre-Ordering your book now.
I want to live an emotionally healthy life!!!!!! I know in order to do that my heart needs to change, and healing needs to come, and I need to be diligent in going after that wholeness. Can’t wait to get this book, and to be a part of a community of healing and wholeness!!
Every time I encounter your belief that wholeness and healing and LOVE is possible, I feel torn between hope and the voice that whispers “If it sounds too good to be true, it is.” I’m trying so hard not to get my hopes up because it’s so painful every time they’re dashed, but I’m definitely anticipating this season.
I know exactly what you mean. It’s hard to believe that we can get past our brokenness. Having struggled with depression and anxiety and all the darkness those bring for 18 years, it feels like there’s no reprieve. But I know that those times when I’ve given my pain to God were the only times I ever felt truly comforted. So I’m excited to see wbat this season brings as well!
Every time I encounter your belief that wholeness and healing and LOVE is possible, I feel torn between hope and the voice that whispers “If it sounds too good to be true, it is.” I’m trying so hard not to get my hopes up because it’s so painful every time they’re dashed, but I’m definitely anticipating this season.
Is there anywhere else you can preorder apart from Barnes and noble if you live outside of the US?
Have you tried Amazon?
Hey girl
I just wanted to tell u and everyone that it is possible for ur heart to be made new again! Granted yes you will always hit trials along the way but that is the way life is. But God wants to see if you will really rely on him when u go through hard times. Way back I have grown up in church my mom me and my sis and bro would go to church together. Well I was a. Christian on what I thought was a Christian through a child’s eyes. I hit 9th grade and things were kind of going downhill for me. I believed in God but from ages 16-24 were rough.
I had went through horrible depression and anxiety throughout highschool. When I was 17 is when I started with an eating disorder and a cutter. Plus on top of all that still the depression and anxiety. By time I got to my senior yr if someone were to ask me do u believe in God my answer was yea…(pause)… I believe in God. Well after I graduated highschool my youth pastor of 4 yrs killed himself BC I found out he had raped someone and didn’t want to be thrown in jail so he crashed his car and it had burst into flames. That was really difficult for me. I think that might have been my last straw at that time.
Well when I turned 20 I moved to Cincinnati Ohio. And this is where I was starting to get into the same sex relationship. I thought this is where I was suppose to be. Now if u were to ask me do you believe in God I wud of been like well I’m a Christian but I’m not exactly where I should be.
Staying in Cincinnati I went to the clubs alot and partied alot! I also had a moment where I wud snort vicoden or whatever seemed like vicoden. During the two yrs I was there I also was into the ouija boards. Which def wasn’t good BC of a couple experiences that my roommate had went through when this all happened.
I decided Ill go to church and see what people thought of me dressing all punk! Bc you know Christians are suppose to accept u how u r. Well let me tell u the church I went to didn’t I hardly had anyone talk to me but a couple ppl. I waited and months went by and then I went back and was dressed all nice and “normal” I guess u could say lol. AMD so many people talked to me that day. I do think God had been with me through all this otherwise I would of totally rebeled.
So through all that when I was 22 I moved back home NC of situations that I had to. Plus FYI living in Cincinnati is really expensive! But when I moved back if you would of asked me do u believe in God I would of just shrugged my shoulders and said idk. But someone from my work had me start going to church and even tho I tried to rebel I kept going. At 24 yrs old I decided on March 30 I accepted God and got baptized and it was the most amazing thing I could of ever done!! God spoke to me and pretty much told me ur ready go! And I hate being in front of alot of ppl it scares me but I knew I had to! To this day I have been a Christian for 2 yrs and yes I have lost some friends BC of my decision. Yes I was talked down to bc of my decision. But I knew in my heart this time I knew what I wanted! I wanted a life where God was the center of my life.
Now don’t get me wrong I have struggled with things still. But BC I’m looking to God I think I’m able to have a male figure love me. And that is a huge step for me. To even think about opening my heart to let someone in. Cuz I’ve been hurt by others through out my life. But I give thanks to God! And Christa with your help u have really gotten me through diff things! Thank you so much for everything you have said to the public it has helped me more than u cud ever imagine! I just want to thank you so much! I still look to u today BC u were one of the people in my life to really get me back on track! Thank so much girl!! I love u to pieces!!!
Jaymee
Hey girl
I just wanted to tell u and everyone that it is possible for ur heart to be made new again! Granted yes you will always hit trials along the way but that is the way life is. But God wants to see if you will really rely on him when u go through hard times. Way back I have grown up in church my mom me and my sis and bro would go to church together. Well I was a. Christian on what I thought was a Christian through a child’s eyes. I hit 9th grade and things were kind of going downhill for me. I believed in God but from ages 16-24 were rough.
I had went through horrible depression and anxiety throughout highschool. When I was 17 is when I started with an eating disorder and a cutter. Plus on top of all that still the depression and anxiety. By time I got to my senior yr if someone were to ask me do u believe in God my answer was yea…(pause)… I believe in God. Well after I graduated highschool my youth pastor of 4 yrs killed himself BC I found out he had raped someone and didn’t want to be thrown in jail so he crashed his car and it had burst into flames. That was really difficult for me. I think that might have been my last straw at that time.
Well when I turned 20 I moved to Cincinnati Ohio. And this is where I was starting to get into the same sex relationship. I thought this is where I was suppose to be. Now if u were to ask me do you believe in God I wud of been like well I’m a Christian but I’m not exactly where I should be.
Staying in Cincinnati I went to the clubs alot and partied alot! I also had a moment where I wud snort vicoden or whatever seemed like vicoden. During the two yrs I was there I also was into the ouija boards. Which def wasn’t good BC of a couple experiences that my roommate had went through when this all happened.
I decided Ill go to church and see what people thought of me dressing all punk! Bc you know Christians are suppose to accept u how u r. Well let me tell u the church I went to didn’t I hardly had anyone talk to me but a couple ppl. I waited and months went by and then I went back and was dressed all nice and “normal” I guess u could say lol. AMD so many people talked to me that day. I do think God had been with me through all this otherwise I would of totally rebeled.
So through all that when I was 22 I moved back home NC of situations that I had to. Plus FYI living in Cincinnati is really expensive! But when I moved back if you would of asked me do u believe in God I would of just shrugged my shoulders and said idk. But someone from my work had me start going to church and even tho I tried to rebel I kept going. At 24 yrs old I decided on March 30 I accepted God and got baptized and it was the most amazing thing I could of ever done!! God spoke to me and pretty much told me ur ready go! And I hate being in front of alot of ppl it scares me but I knew I had to! To this day I have been a Christian for 2 yrs and yes I have lost some friends BC of my decision. Yes I was talked down to bc of my decision. But I knew in my heart this time I knew what I wanted! I wanted a life where God was the center of my life.
Now don’t get me wrong I have struggled with things still. But BC I’m looking to God I think I’m able to have a male figure love me. And that is a huge step for me. To even think about opening my heart to let someone in. Cuz I’ve been hurt by others through out my life. But I give thanks to God! And Christa with your help u have really gotten me through diff things! Thank you so much for everything you have said to the public it has helped me more than u cud ever imagine! I just want to thank you so much! I still look to u today BC u were one of the people in my life to really get me back on track! Thank so much girl!! I love u to pieces!!!
Jaymee
is there anywhere to read about this in detail without buying the book??
I am looking forward to this book AND in the meantime, to the next Heart Made Whole podcast! The first one was sooo good! The revelation I received by asking about my heart’s door was beautiful. Keep going, Christa!