Instablog

Is God more male than female?

I’ve grown up in a culture that taught me to be like God. . But I’m not a father, nor do I want to be. I’m not a son, with no…

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Does This Little Girl Deserve Punishment?

I found this picture of myself at my parents house recently, staring at it with tears puddling up around my green eyes. My little face was so angelic, so pure. I am…

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A Woman Making Peace With Her Process

“I am a woman making peace with her process.” 🙌🏻 . I have a light side. I have a dark side. I have a spirit side. I have a shadow…

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Choose Your Anger

I have always hated my anger. . ‘Angry Christa’ was a part of my personality who lived deep inside my heart, & I never knew when she was going to…

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Choose Your Choices

Hi. 🙋🏻 I’m Christa. . And at 39 years old, I’m finally getting the courage to start being myself privately AND publicly. . For many years I chose things to…

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Choose Your Body

I have lived in a body I have been at war with. I have lived in a body I have hated. I have lived in a body I have been…

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Inflexible?

In preschool I could sit cross legged like all the other kids. But kindergarten started and my right hip had locked up & my leg wouldn’t turn. Over the years I…

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Are you abandoning yourself?

Abandonment. My truest, deepest, longest fear. * To be adored and then abandoned by those that I love….a reoccurring pattern throughout my 39 years of life. Tale after tale of…

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Am I Safe?

I’ve never really felt safe.  Not really. * I thought my husband’s love would finally make me feel safe. But when it felt absent, my safety went away. I thought…

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The fear of daughters

Daughters. ❤️ For years I was terrified of raising daughters. I was afraid I would pass on all my wounds and teach them to grow up and be all the…

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Pink Eye Blues

I have pink eye. 👁 And I look like someone punched me in a bar fight and then poured salt in the wound. I’ve caught myself staring at my reflection…

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Committing to myself

When I got married, I had no idea what a loving commitment really was. In my mind, it meant that I had finally found the man whose unconditional love had…

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Smiling In A Storm

So far my day has been interesting. Lox was up for an hour at 1am…so I was up for an hour or two at 1am! Then when I got breakfast…

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Mom. What Does God Look Like?

Yesterday, Moses stared out the window and asked me, “Mom, what does God look like.” 🤔 I looked quickly in my rear view mirror, catching a glimpse of my green…

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Get Your HEAD Swimsuit Ready

Last week, I packed up half of my closet and put in in a box to send to my mom in Texas.   The clothes I selected weren’t old, they…

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Atheism

I know I said I don’t have time for more than an instablog these days, but I had to get something quite large off my chest and out of my…

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Foster

There are 7000 kids in foster care in the state of TN alone, & before you read on, I want you to actually imagine 7000 living, breathing faces who do…

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Hair

Today on Mother’s Day, I’m grateful that my hair is falling out in massive clumps for the 4th time. 🙊🤦🏻‍♀️ Let me explain before you gag. Each time this happened…

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“I had planned to end my life, but chose to give it one last shot and signed up for the Master Heart Course. I finally found what I was looking for. My life has changed in ways I could never could put into words, being healed far beyond what I could imagine. I have a long way to go, but this course literally saved my life..”

Mayah
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